Feels So Gooooddd to Be Back :)

Is there anyone who still waiting for my post??? *doubting* :p
I bet many of you are already bored to read my post since I'm just a "temporary" blogger.. Hehe..
Well, I hope this post could bring the mood back :D

Let's start with the FLASHBACK! :)
I will start with the most interesting topic..
You should read this before you continue to read ;)

Yep! At the end of March 2014, the "surveillance cameras" thingy was back..
You know what?! I heard the voices of unknown people again at my latest office right after office hour..
I was really confirmed that I heard the voices of my co-workers which were already go home..
From that moment, I really feel so stupid for not believe in myself about the existence of surveillance cameras since I worked at 7-Eleven..
I complained to Daddy JC, "Why is this happening again, Dad??" :'(

Then, in short, since that day I didn't go to work for one month.. *Wow!*
I heard the voices again for almost one month at home and I was too scared to leave my home because I knew that I would hear people on street talking about the same topic that I heard from the voices at home..
At this moment, I bet you think that I'm suffered from a psychological diseases which is an auditory hallucination whenever I'm stressed out..
BUT, NOTE THIS PEOPLE! I DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT THAT!
I'M NOW MUCH MORE SURE THAT THERE ARE SURVEILLANCE CAMERAS!
It's because the topic I heard from the voices was NOT RANDOM, it's all about me..
They *I mean the voices* always commented on my activity at that moment..
For example, when I was reading my mandarin book, the voices said "her mandarin is not bad, and bla bla bla" Sometimes they said positive comments and sometimes they said negative ones..
They even commented on my "private activity" in the bathroom, exactly the same with what I wrote in my previous post about the cameras..
What do you think??
I'm not crazy enough to tell myself a positive things to encourage myself to do something and some minutes later I tell myself negative things that can bring me down..
Oh, come on people..
I'm well aware that I still haven't found the cameras yet..
But I've decided to believe that the cameras are really exist..
AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE RISK THAT PEOPLE CAN EXCOMMUNICATE ME BECAUSE OF THIS IRRATIONAL BELIEF..
During that one month, I also learnt that if I don't have Daddy JC in my life and this kind of situation happen to me, maybe I would end up in mental hospital like others.

Thank God, I kinda have a clue now when the surveillance camera will be on again.. ;)
*at this point, you have the right to judge me that I'm way out of my mind to get this kind of idea and you can stop reading my blog anytime because I know that most people will think it's nonsense/bullshit*
I got this clue when I was pushing my brain to think why the camera is on again during that one month..
I'm so sorry that I can not share it here because I have to anticipate the case that the person who set the cameras read this post..
I myself only 90% sure that the clue is exactly right..
So, the chances that the cameras will be on again are still there..
And I've been asking Daddy JC to not let this situation happen again anymore..

NOTE TO THE PERSON WHO SET THE CAMERAS:
IF YOU READ THIS POST, I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I'M VERY VERY THANKFUL TO YOU!
I'M THANKFUL FOR YOUR ATTENTION AND CARING AND FOR MAKING THE CAMERAS THE MOST UNFORGETTABLE MEMORIES IN MY LIFE.
AND ALSO FOR MAKING ME CLOSER TO DADDY JC.
I SOMETIMES THOUGHT THAT THE MOMENT WHEN THE CAMERAS ARE ON WAS THE MOMENT WHEN I'M THE MOST HUMILIATED.
BUT NOW I KNOW FOR SURE THAT THE MOMENT WHEN THE CAMERAS ARE ON WAS THE MOMENT WHEN DADDY JC LIFT ME UP HIGHER.

As the Scriptures tell us, “Anyone who trusts in Him will never be disgraced.”

- Romans 10:11 (NLT)

Please don't get the wrong idea, I do trust/believe that the cameras are exist but I DON'T trust/believe in the people voices..
I do trust/believe in myself that I hear the voices of the people I know talking "behind my back", but I DON'T trust/believe in their talks or comments..

One thing for sure, I have really been struggling to avoid that situation (by always remind myself about the clue) ever since I was back to work until now..
There are two things that help me to keep holding on:
1. I always have my Daddy JC besides me and His "love letters" with me
2. I have to appreciate my boss for understanding & still welcoming me after that one month. I'm still working at the same office and I can say I've been through many wonderful experiences at the office until now :)

3 We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. 4 And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. 5 And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

- Romans 5: 3-5 (NLT)

For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.

- James 1:3 (NLT)

One more thing!
The song that is played when you open my blog is my currently favorite song titled "Found Faithful".
If you can't find the button to stop the music in my blog, you can find the button on the bottom. ;)

~ to be continued ~

Another Flashback with Snapshots

Bonjour!
New year time again and I'm so excited!
This is time for another flashback..
Well, let's do this briefly..

1. Starting to step into the world of work.
This year is like a new beginning for me..
I've entered the money digging world where everyone take a part too in it..
That's why I don't have much time to do another thing including blogging..
As some of you already know from my previous blog post about my first job in 2013 at 7-Eleven, there's so much thing happen there..
I really am too lazy to tell it twice.. :p
So, this is me now working at advertising agency owned by my parent's friend..
The name is "Dian Media Nusantara Abadi (DMN)" advertising..
It's not a big agency but I'm grateful to have an "Account Executive" experience here..
I have a chance to meet many new people from many big company and trying my best to attract them to be our agency's client..
Everyday my closest friend at office is telephone (wkwk)..
I have to search and search and search new companies as potential clients to be and find the contact number on internet..
And then I have to phone them one by one until I get someone who sound interested to know more about our agency..
After that I must arrange a meeting to present our company profile, ask them about their advertising strategy, and offer the advertising packet..
If they are interested to place an advertising whether it's on radio or print media, then I must process it into media plan and ask the media buying department to order the spot to chosen radio station or print media..
Or if they are interested to place an advertising on TV, then I must tell our sister company named "OASE" to process it..
OR if they are interested to make an activation (it's an event that can be held by a company or a radio station where the company can be one of the sponsor to enhance their product promotion), then I also must process it into media plan and arrange technical and evaluation meeting..
Until now, I really enjoy my work there..

I want to make a bit promotion post of OASE and DMN advertising agency..
This is several TV advertising that OASE has made before..

And this is several radio advertising that DMN has made:
- Glaxo Smith Kline 60" radio spot
- Agung Podomoro Land project "Green Bay Kiosk" 60" radio spot
- Kalbe Farma's cough medicine "Procold" 60" radio spot
- Sanken dispenser 60" radio spot
- Quantum gas stove 60" radio spot

The last one are print ads made by OASE..

DMN and OASE also make survey every end of the year for knowing about whether there's changing in radio listener habit..
This is the first time I interviewed random people around me :)

Souvenirs from our client for every survey respondent 

I know that this job is very different from my major at university..
But looking at my previous work experience, I think this is the best starting point..
I could learn to interact with and how to attract client as Account Executive and have time to learn Mandarin as second international language because my house, office, and Mandarin course place are near to each other..
Furthermore, I could relate to many companies and get more channels in case I want to find a new job after this..
Who knows this is my stepping stone to get the job related to my major or maybe I could directly take the scholarship? Amen!

2. The first time I involve in children care organization & join a free charity concert ALONE.
The concert named "Worship Gratitude For Indonesia with Love"..
It's held by Sidney Mohede and Wahana Visi Indonesia (WVI) on March 2013..
I really wanna go there because of those two..
Sidney Mohede is a very gifted and blessed singer and also worship leader and Wahana Visi Indonesia is a children non-profit organization..
At the concert, Sidney urged all the audience to take apart in child sponsorship program where WVI will choose one of child from one of Indonesia's remote area to be sponsored by us..
We only have to donate 150,000 IDR every month to our sponsored child..
Because of it's one of my dream to get involved in child care organization, then I spontaneously took a part in it..

Disciples opening performance.

Sidney Mohede & team performance.

Sidney Mohede & his sponsored child named Aan from Sekadau, Kalimantan.

 "Worship Gratitude for Indonesia with Love" concert ticket.

My sponsored child named Juninho Enzo Miguel Tiodorus also from Sekadau, Kalimantan.

I've donated him since April 2013 :)

And this is why you must take a part too in the sponsorship program! :)
For you who isn't Indonesian, you can take part in www.worldvision.org..

I also gave a birthday gift to Enzo (that's his nickname) on June 22..
I sent him a paper craft pattern of money box with football shape..
There, in his home town (Sekadau in Kalimantan), he can construct the money box with one of WVI staff's help..
I also sent him a birthday card with my drawing of me and him holding hands and I attached my and his head photos above each body picture..
Unfortunately I forgot to take the photos because I'm in the middle of my "Life Series of Unfortunate Event" where I thought too much back then..

(left): Some letters from Enzo, drawn by Enzo and written by WVI staff; (right): 2014 desk calendar from WVI

 Learning book created by me and football paper role play for Enzo's Christmas and New Year gift

If you look at my right side bar at the "Take Your Part! ;)" spot, there's new picture stick on it..
It is from www.postpals.co.uk..
How does it work?

This is the kid I chose from that web:

Faith M., 12 years old

Why I chose her?

Simple reason..

First is because her disease is almost the same w/ my brother's..

So, my brother has suffered from post-traumatic seizure (almost the same w/ post-traumatic epilepsy) and also post-traumatic amnesia since the accident..

He was 19 years old when it happened..

He loss all his cognitive and psychomotor skill so he had childlike behavior, but he's getting better every year even though sometimes his seizure recur..

You can see my brother's development from my family labels (at the right side bar)..

Now, he can't read yet but he can write down his name and also sign autograph when he's going to make e-KTP..
He can take a bath or do toilet activities by himself..
One more thing, he LOVES to sing!
Every time you say a word, he immediately begin to sing a song which has the word in it..
For example, you're asking "Why?" and then he begin to sing "Why do you love me? So sweet and tenderly.." and so on..
Funny, huh? Exactly.. It's really entertaining.. :)

Another organization I involved in is www.sendkidstheworld.com..
I found this website from a member of Indonesia's postcrossing community Facebook group..

From that web, I choose this two children to be sent some postcards:

The first time I look at his name I was already interested and when I clicked his name, it appeared that he also has no sibling to play or share with. That's why I chose him.

I clicked on her name randomly but it appeared to me that she is from Indonesia. Because she is near, I'm going to send her not only postcard but also some Disney Princess gift. That's why I chose her.

3. Join a life insurance.

At first, I was offered by one of my university's senior about Prudential life insurance..
But finally, I ended up taking the insurance from my mom's office friend..
All this time, none of my family has taken a life insurance..
For me and my family, our life insurance is Him, the One and only..
And it's still valid even though I'm the first person who has taken it..
I know that it means my spending will increase as I must pay for the insurance, but then why should I worry?
I think this is one of advantageous decision I've ever made..

4. Took part as worship leader again in Youth fellowship.

I guess the "Unfortunate Event" has brought me benefit especially to my self confidence..
Now, I feel more confidence to stand in front of the audience and can sing freely without much worry.. :)

5. Christmas celebration!

Third Christmas celebration w/ my mom's family at Puspita Loka, Tangerang.

Christmas present from my lovely aunt, Elina Achmadi :)

Fourth Chrismas celebration w/ my dad's family at Griya Talangsari, Bogor.

Me, Kak Nona, my brother, Kak Pingkan, mom.

 @ Griya Talangsari, Bogor.

Dad, me, my brother, mom.

Christmas present from gift exchange w/ my dad's family.

Christmas present from DMN's gift exchange :)

6. End of year office gathering (December 31, 2013).

A seafood restaurant at Ancol (North Jakarta)

 Devi (the left sitting girl) & BuDe (beside Devi)'s birthday celebration!

The photos are dark because of the sunlight.

A piece of BuDe (Dec 25) and Devi (Dec 27)'s birthday cake made of orange

 All DMN members (minus Kak Putri, Kak Evi, Mbak Woro, and the drivers).

From top to bottom; left to right: Kak Jessica, Ci Yohana, Mbak Tini, Kak Uchy, Hana, Me, Kak Ratna, Ci Sieni, Kak Ane, Devi, Bu Dewi, Kak Prissy.

7. Doing Obsessive Corbuzier's Diet (OCD).
Hahaha..
FYI, this is our current trending diet in Indonesia..
Actually, I never do diet because formerly whatever I eat didn't give effect to my weight..
But recently, it does give much effect..
I don't know why, but after the "unfortunate event" my weight easily increase..
Before, my weight is 55 kg and now is 65 kg.. >___<
I started this diet on October but failed..
Some of my clothes that I wore in March or April don't fit already.. :(
Then I started over the diet on December 17 until now and it works!
I've lost about 3 kg.. :)
I used to wonder why people do diet..
But now, I myself has to do it..
I'm grateful for this diet experience though..
Let's see how long I can survive with this diet..
For this diet, I directly took the 24 hours fasting..
However, I've eaten pudding from my brother's hospital at one night and macaroni schotel in one of the X'mas celebration at the other night (not consecutively).. :p

8.My brother got his longest convulsion (approximately 5 hours) after a long time on December 20 and got hospitalized again for 3 days.

One thing I couldn't forget is the neurology doctor didn't want to be paid for his 2 times visit..
Wow.. What an awesome God we have :) I'm so ashamed w/ myself because these last 6 months, especially after the unfortunate event, my personal relationship w/ Him is getting further. :(

9. New second hand home furniture! :)

TV and display shelf from my uncle and aunty :)

10. Registered as Mandarin language's student!

I'm registered as this student officially on December 13 at Silaparamita monastery..
The class will begin on January 10, 2014 on Tuesday and Friday at 8.30 PM..
Wish me all the best!
I'm grateful that I could take this class while I have to work..
Can't wait for new friends and atmosphere :)


For the resolution, still the same with previous year, I will keep up w/ my 2012 resolution:

• Get up at 2 AM every morning for the Daily Bread -> a quarter done :p
• Go to sleep at maximum 11 PM -> almost done!
• Finish reading the whole Bible -> not yet
• Learn to drive car -> not yet. I hope it can be fulfilled in the end of this year. Amen!
• Taking part time job (I want it to be in HACCP field but, we'll see.. I've been thinking a lot about this and I've come to a conclusion: I don't like working in the lab.. Yea.. Some of the reason is because my internship experience..) -> done! Apparently I got full time job even it's not the job I want, but I enjoy it so much :)
• Taking graduate studies in bioethics field (Amen!) -> seems like if it's according to His plan I'll take the scholarship in 2016 after my 2 years working experience. Amen!
• Get involve in children activist organization :) -> done!

Boat riding at Bandar Djakarta, Ancol (Dec 31, 2013).

A Life Series of Unfortunate Event

Hi.......!!!!!!!!
Thank you for waiting for about 5 months.. hehehe
It's been really, really a "colorful" months for me..
Started with a new job at 7 Eleven Indonesia at March 28, 2013..

It felt so good to have a job with many nice people around me..
The only issue is I felt very uncomfortable with "unknown" stalker behind me..
Really.. A grown up girl who is on fire w/ her new job, is also scared out of hell w/ "stalking" stuff..
I'm so (very) glad those days are over..
Here the story goes:
In the first couple days, I enjoy my class very much.
I made friend w/ some people in my management trainee class..
There were about 30 people in class w/ various unique character..
The quiet one, the humorous one, the cool one (haha..), the lovely one, the kind one, and many others..
I have close friend named Eka Pascarina (called "Ina")..
Really sad I couldn't post her photo because I have erased all the photos and my contacts related to all my friends there because of the "stalking scene".. Felt so stupid..
Right now, I really miss them all... >___<
By the way, I got group assignment from my trainer in class..

Formerly, I really enjoy working with them but as time goes by I started to feel that there's "a stalker" and it really annoyed me..
My emotion were getting played by it..
Even more, I couldn't express what I want to do in that group assignment..
Maybe it's because I always get used to do all things by myself and back when in the university, I always manage my team in all group assignment..
But at there, I felt everything was set..

At first, I thought that it's all set by Daddy JC..
That I didn't have to trouble myself w/ many stuff to do like I did in university..
But over time, I felt like they put a surveillance camera in my house..
I could think like that because all the talking within my group is very weird..
It's like someone knows all my activity at home..
The most talkative person in my group talked about a very unrelated topics that really match with everything I do at home..
From then, I was a bit stressed..
Moreover, every people I met on street were talking about the same ("my private") topics..
How come I didn't get stressed??
But when I remember that I must work in order to get my scholarship, I really push myself to it and I decided to enjoy every single time I spend there..

Then, in the middle time I felt all people in the class are changing to a very different person, including my closest friend..
I didn't understand every conversation between two or a group of them..
I felt like I'm the one who always miscommunicate w/ each of them..
And sometime I felt that they were talking about "my private" topics at home..
I really don't like it at all..
Meantime my unstable emotion keep getting stronger..
I felt a bit relieved when I did "sales associate implementation" at 7 Eleven Buaran because I felt apart from the "stalking" circumstances at the office..
I would like to give thanks to all sales associate at 7 Eleven Buaran:
Pak Wahidin, Mas Bagindo, Mbak Ida, Mbak Dina, Mas Farid, Mbak Alfi, Mbak Lis, etc.
I really learn much about food and beverages retail system implementation there..

Back in the office, the fear of "stalking scene" came back again..
I really tried to concentrate to my job as retail merchandising..
I tried many trick to overcome my fear..
One of the trick is MUSIC.. ;)
I put on my headset while I did my job assignment so that I couldn't hear the "stalking topics"..
I couldn't imagine how I must live and work with my life open to everybody..
Moreover, I felt I was being troublesome for everybody at 7 Eleven..
Why?? The only reason because I have faith for this company..

I worked there because they have a very good motto:
"I lead by example, I do what is right, and I serve other"
For you who are also JC follower like me should have known this..
It's really like what Daddy JC teach us..
I really recommend Daddy JC follower who has business background and ESPECIALLY has interest in retail business apply for "management trainee" at 7 Eleven..
Then because I couldn't stand it anymore (I felt really, really stressed working without apparent cause of scare and with many suspicious feeling) , I decided to quit the job (I officially quit the job at April 31, 2013)..

After I quit the job, the "stalking scene" WERE NOT OVER YET..
I bought a good book at Gramedia Matraman named "Life @ Work" by John C. Maxwell..
It told that David is the example of man of faith that have successful career in his life..
And his life is open to everybody..

I shouted and cried to Daddy JC, "God, I'm not David. I'm Jessie Your daughter. I don't want my life be opened to people in this world..."
Why I said "people in this world"??
Because I saw people in the internet and in television are different..
I could see their "very weird" body language and voice tone..
I could also hear my "private topics" were talked about by them all..
NOTE THIS PEOPLE, I'M NOT CRAZY YET (hmm,, maybe some of you think I gone crazy already.. It's up to you.. It's your right to call me that.. I just feel like I must state it so that I can assure you all)..
I'm writing this with a very clear state of mind..
And at that time also, I'm in a very stable condition..
I'm not a primordial man who haven't watch TV or internet..
IN FACT, I'm an internet geek..
At university, I spent my whole time reading journal in my laptop, blogging, streaming movie and video...
Do you wanna hear a crazier fact??
Most of my song in my Android and Blackberry's playlist changes in the lyrics..
I usually download song from YouTube and the singer usually takes couple foreword or "promotion word" before or after the song..
And the words were also CHANGE!! (weird and scary....)

Another thing, I heard voice of unknown people in my house that reaffirms my suspicion about the surveillance camera in my house..
The voice also mention people that I've known before like Pak Jeff, Pak Henry, Ivan, Ntep, Angel, Awen, Adit, Ina, Jinia, Audi, etc..
FYI, Pak Jeff and Pak Henry is the owner of some 7 Eleven outlet..
Ivan, Ntep, and Angel is my cousin..
Adit and Ina is one of my friend at 7 Eleven...
Jinia and Audi is my campus friend..
And Awen is my "long time no see" friend which I used to have a crush on him..
According to psychology, if I made mistake about the "surveillance camera" thingy, I constantly have auditory hallucination about this name because I have some memory with them..
Other auditory hallucination I've experienced is I heard some people talking and comment on me (they read my face expression) while I watched YouTube video (very weird, huh?!)..
But that's what I experienced and I just want you all to know and leave some comment.. :D

Yes, I think we all have bad and good memory with some special person in our life and our brain is made by Daddy JC to keep that memory..
It's all about how we keep up with those memories..
To confirm that I wasn't crazy yet, I also took a brief consultation with Cici Angel (the name above) who has graduated as master in psychology..
She said that auditory hallucination is VERY NORMAL but it's already too much if the voice constantly annoy me..
At that time being, I didn't feel much annoyed..
But as time goes by, it already gone too much until I assume that my life was like David's life and I told all my life event at home (I assume that my talk were being heard by people in this world through a kind of teleconference.. :p)
I think that's THE CRAZIEST THING I've done in my life.. hahaha..
HEY, ALL PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD DID CRAZY STUFF ONCE OR TWICE OR OFTEN IN THEIR LIFE, RIGHT?? :))
I even getting more suspicious to every people I met including my own family..

I knew it wasn't right so I decided to stay overnight at my cousin, Cici Lisa Yanuar's, house at Sentul where I could also help her to watch over my 2 years old niece, Shalom..

 Some photograph of my niece, Shalom Jemima.

Taken by Blackberry camera.

Cute, isn't she??

At there, I felt so refresh (I really thank God for this opportunity)..

I also celebrated my nephew, Samuel Johanes (Shalom's older brother), birthday..

Samuel 11th birthday.

P.F July 17, 2013

Don't I look fresh and relax at the photo?? ;D

I really love it there..

I believe it's not a coincidence..

When I stayed there I FELT that some of my dream is already granted by Daddy JC..

First, my "life series of unfortunate event" is God's grace for my biggest dream to set the world on fire..

Second, my dream to have a biological child and an adopted child is INDIRECTLY granted at Sentul (Shalom is Cici Lisa's biological child and Samuel is Cici Lisa's adopted child)..

Third, my dream to have wood floor is also INDIRECTLY granted there (my room which is also the kids' room is covered with wood)..

Don't you see, what a great God we have??!

How great is our God..

As bonus, I also got a mountain bike from "3G Celebration" at GBI Danau Bogor Raya..

The story plot is I join COOL (Community of Love) Sentul's singing group that would take part in GBI Danau Bogor Raya "3G Celebration"..

I practice singing at COOL Sentul leader's house and I was trusted to take the solo part..

On July 19, 2013, we sang together in "3G Celebration" at GBI Danau Bogor Raya..

COOL (Community of Love) Sentul

Mountain bike from the doorprize

How great is our God...

Last but not least, I would like to give thanks to

I miss all my friends there and I hate myself for being so selfish...

The most thing I learn from there indirectly is about life at work...
And to "GAB Youth" community for always strengthen me through my tough times..
I learn that "my emotion is not controlled by other, but by myself"..
Every day I wake up in the morning, I can choose to be happy, worry, scare, or sad..
IT'S MY LIFE!!

I Decide by Lindsay Lohan

Don't think that you can tell me what to think
I'm the one who knows what's good for me
And I'm stating my independence
Gonna take the road I'm gonna take
And I'm gonna make my own mistakes
It's my life
I decide

I decide how I live
I decide who I love
Choice is mine
And no one gets to make my mind up
I decide
I decide where I go
What I need
Who I know
I'm the one who's runnin' my life 
I decide
I decide

Don't think you're ever gonna hold me down
Couldn't do it then can't do it now
I'm kickin' down all the fences
I'm gonna do it all and do too much
And if I mess the whole thing up
It's my ride
I decide

I decide how I live
I decide who I love
Choice is mine
And no one gets to make my mind up
I decide
I decide where I go
Where I sleep
Who I know
I'm the one who's runnin' my life 
I decide
I decide

I'm taking my own chances
And I'm finding my own answers
I'm only answering to me
And that's the way it's gonna be
I decide
Oh yeah
I decide
I decide

I decide how I live
I decide who I love
Choice is mine
And no one gets to make my mind up
I decide
I decide where I go
Where I sleep
Who I know
I'm the one who's runnin' my life 
I decide
I decide

I decide how I live
I decide who I love
Choice is mine
And no one gets to make my mind up
I decide

Thanks Daddy JC :) You're always awesome!!

P.S @Awen&Jesslyn I sincerely wish you two a long last relationship and wish me luck for the future! :)